Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The 5 Most Retarded SEC Traditions

by VolFan46205311979, special to LWS Tennessee's Vol Walk, State's cowbells, Bama's cheating. All important and time-honored traditions in the Southeastern Conference. But contrary to popular belief, not every one of the SEC's pigskin rituals is great. Let's take a look at the 5 most retarded traditions of our beloved conference. (5) "insert word"-eaux LSU country, while overpopulated with God-fearing, neo-fascist Republicans, reserves a special place in its heart for the Motherland - France. That's right. France. Don't let any of these ignorant buffoons attempt to explain it away. "Naw brotha. It ain't da France, it's Creole baby! Laissez les bon temps rouler!" Hey tardicus rex, that's French. I think it's noble that LSU fans take the time to celebrate their feminine side. It takes courage to completely emasculate yourself in front of your opponents. But LSU guy is a trailblazer, and he will fearlessly walk that line while proudly sporting the hat he stole from Dolemite and the pink plastic necklace he was tossed after showing a fat girl his testicles. The problem is that an LSU meaux faux doesn't kneaux bordeaux from J-Leaux. Their working knowledge of the land of stinky cheese is limited to "buffet" and "Chevrolet", and both are much more Louisiana than France. A little known fact, the word "go" in French is not spelled g-e-a-u-x. It's actually spelled f-a-g. Interestingly, that is how all French words are spelled. It's time we fellow SEC fans started giving LSU their due for sticking behind France, especially considering recent international events. Let's reward them for their bravery. I'll be the first if I must. Dear LSU, let me commend you on losing to a very bad Tennessee team at home in 2005. Your strength rivaled that of a liver pate. You displayed all the courage and bravery of the French 1st Battalion circa 1941. You geaux heauxmeaux. (4) Bear Obsession
We all know the story. In 1714, a young Bear Bryant saved an entire orphanage from certain death by pissing on a 4 alarm blaze and putting it out. In 1776, he penned the Declaration of Independence. In 1887, he invented the car. And in 19-something, he won a bunch of football games.
The problem is that the Bear isn't as hot as he used to be. He's still got the touch, yes, but there are reports that he has begun to slip. Ex-assistants have grumbled about his playcalling, suggesting that there are times when the Bear won't respond to questions or select a play for an entire game. Many have questioned his work ethic, as inside sources have revealed that he hasn't shown up to work in over twenty years.
Bammers remain confident, however. They continue to believe that he is the key to returning to national prominence. Some think that Bama is taking advantage of an old man, some would say that Bama should let Bryant rest in peace. But to quote the Bear, as played by Tom Beringer, "He ain't quitin".
(3) The "woo" in Rocky Top A personal subject, to be sure, and a contentious one at that. Rocky Top is a fantastic unofficial fight song. It encapsulates both the culture and landscape of the Smoky Mountains. More importantly, it is annoys opposing fans worse than a case of King Pubic Crabs. For those who don't know, let me fill you in on the background of the "woo". Decades ago, Rocky Top was a serious ode sung by men as tribute to the heroes on the field and the land in which they lived. It was sung in proud and severe tones as whiskey was guzzled, much like the Vikings of Northern Europe. Then came Mary Francis Henderson of Shelbyville, TN, who attended the 1976 Vandy game with her Phi Mu sisters. She did not know the words to Rocky Top, but after 7 vodka and Tab's, she decided she needed to participate. She interrupted her girlfriends' babbling and uttered these now famous words, "Oh my God, Rocky Top needs to be more sassy!" And so the "woo" was born. Rocky Top always starts well, but the "woo" crashes over me like Oprah on skis. I hear an especially enthusiastic "woo" from behind, and turn around to find four 14 year old girls cheering proudly. After the song, they sit down and begin text messaging each other, even though they are sitting side by side. They patiently wait for the next "woo" opportunity.
The "woo" represents everything wrong with modern college sports. After I hear it, I expect the "Fun Police" to begin shooting T-shirts into the crowd via air cannons. I anticipate mini-parachutes to come falling from above carrying certificates for free Rally's burgers. The "woo" is horrific, atrocious, degrading, nauseating and unjustifiable. Even Lulu and Junior disapprove.
(2) The rolling of Toomer's Corner Ahh, Auburn. Land of the hapless fan. If Auburn fans didn't have football, they would just play Magic the Gathering. They would be content with simply owning a comic book store. Following a win, thousands of Auburn fans take their finest toilet paper over to Toomer's Corner, a landmark on Auburn's campus, and young and old alike gleefully throw said paper into the trees. There are many high fives exchanged. After covering the earth with the paper, they then paint each other with pixiedust and begin a secret ceremony that is cryptically referred to as "the Tiger train". The toilet paper is said to allow for easy cleanup.

Aftermath indeed

Rolling is a right of passage for any 12 year old boy. The most important element of this act, however, is the risk of getting caught. Rolling university property with no chance of a penalty is like drugging your grandmother and then letting the air out of her tires. Kenny Irons, star running back and future biochemist, was asked in a recent interview about his favorite Auburn tradition. His response was more impressive than anything I could ever write: "The rolling of Toomer's Corner because I had never experienced anything so amazing in my life. When I came to Auburn I saw all these people huddled around this tree and I was like 'What is this?' You have all of these people and they have all of this toilet paper. They have soft toilet paper and every kind of toilet paper and they are throwing it at a tree. I was like 'Why are they throwing all of this toilet paper at a tree?'"

A fair question in my opinion.

(1) Ole Miss

I know what you are wondering. Which Ole Miss tradition is retarded?

All of 'em.

From the 18 M.P.H. speed limit to the seersucker to "Hotty Toddy", Ole Miss is the result of a retarded bomb going off in a piece of crap town populated with former high school beauty queens and Colonel Sanders.

The "pageantry" that they boast of is nothing more than a grass field crammed with folding tables and cheap tents picked up at the local K-Mart. Nowhere on earth will you find a higher proportion of red Solo cups, celery sticks, and Chex Mix to humans. Be wary of their shallow claims of classiness - yes those are saltines, yes that is a plastic tablecloth, yes those are McDonald's chicken nuggets, and no that is not your secret recipe for ranch dressing because it says Hidden Valley on the bottle.

Carrying the banner

The most important aspect of Ole Miss-dom, however, is a total lack of interest in the game. The tables, the food, the outfits, the liquor, the travel, the Rebel Walk - the whole damn show - is full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. Unfortunately for the Rebels, Ole Miss sucks at football. This fact is not lost on their fans, as the following war chant demonstrates: "We may not win every game, but we ain't never lost a party."

Ole Miss is so bad this year that they may just lose a party - to St. Benedict's Tuesday bingo game no less. But don't fear for the Rebels, they will keep coming back. Much like herpes, except that the herpes also brings cold chicken fingers from Kroger.

"Hotty Toddy, gosh almighty, who the hell are we?"

An even better question. Maybe Kenny Irons has an answer.

107 comments:

Brad said...

You got off some decent shots with not a whole lot to work with. None of those traditions are very retarded, but you took a good stab at it. Congrats.

Anonymous said...

Have you ever been to Ole Miss, Asshole?

James Clawson said...

You don't like the "whoo"?

What about the stripe on the helmets? Thick or thin?

Big Papi said...

I happen to find the Geaux shit and yeah pretty much everything Ole Miss to be fucking retarded. I think he's spot on.

COLREB said...

I was wearing my Ole Miss T shirt and ripped it off when Brent threw for a TD.

I screamed Wild BoyZ

That should be a tradtion, the wild boys

BamaGator said...

Bear is with Jesus now. Neither will be happy with this

Anonymous said...

To my knowledge, there are no more Ole Miss fans.

travis said...

You're dead solid perfect with your Ole Miss take. What's so freaking impressive about buckets of chicken you picked up 4 hours before the game? While I love Abner's, serving it on a folding table with linen and china is kinda stupid. LSU tailgates are far superior...as long as you wear neutral colors and don't look anyone in the eye.

GeauxLSU said...

You Vols think your so perfect, so much smarter than everyone else. This is shit. What are boys growing in Knoxville? More fof them astronauts? Assholes

Grommit said...

Where is Florida's tradition? We got it too. I can't believe you guys left us out of this.Fuck all of you

Urban said...

I've got a tradition... of whippin' ass

Rupp is Cool said...

You fucks think you invented football and tradition, do you? Well we got Randy Sanders, blow it out your ass

Anonymous said...

worse than the woo at UT is that stupid arse dog bark that plays everytime UT scores a point a home. That sick 'em smokey BS. Man that annoying.

The ator chump arm thing is stupid. Especially when people do it with just one hand.

McRiblets said...

Gay ass motherfucking dick eating ball sweat loving nipple twisting ass munching pole loving knob slobbing UGAy faggots in red pants should be #6.

God said...

Bear isn't up here.

Logan Young said...

LOL.....Please say that you are not serious about your post!.The man upstairs has more important things to concern himself with than Alabama or Auburn!!!!!LIKE SAVING YOUR SOUL FROM HELL.You need to worship him more than your passion for "alabama football".Be honest w/your son and tell him you hope for victory but they play the game and well....anything can happen.(personally I believe AU will win by 10+ points)

Kwyjibo said...

I believe in THE TIDE and i beleive in Mike Shula. He is a very positive influence on our young athletes and coaches the way the game should be coached. I am sick and tired of the complaining going on about him because i would dare say that anyone making these comments could not stand down there and do a better job. If you havent noticed, we have done nothing bu gotten better since he was named head coach at THE University of Alabama. Its only a matter of time (probably next year) before the Tide is back to national championship contenders on a regular basis.
ROLL TIDE!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

The reason no gator traditions are here is because UF did not start playing football until 1990!

Kwyjibo said...

The Tide is truly back...our 13th NC might be this year...but definitely 2007...the traditions of winning with intergrity and class is what we're about...not like those hodlum, grade-fixers across the state. BAMA's BACK!!!

Anonymous said...

Nice list - Ole Miss was spot on!!

Oh... and Geaux Tigers! (see ya in Konxville)

Mike Archer said...

I made LSU what it is today

72 Reb said...

The author is a jackass. Coach O is super smart and he has plan. We will return. Like it was in 2003, when that sorry ass cutcliffe took us to 11-1. Cutt don't know shit. The O is a leader. Look how good we are this year. We scored against Kentucky!!

Your Mom said...

My apologiez for raizin' my sun to bee a total dummass. I ges that'll learn me to bang my bruther. But hey, he had more teef than the rest of the mens in my family...four!

MSU_BullDog said...

I have a fever and the only prescription is more CowBell!

MikeDaTigah said...

The "eaux" thing is because there are many names here that end in those letters.

BTW... "Laissez les bon temps rouler" is Cajun French. Ask a Frenchman what it means, and he will think you are speaking Japanese for the most part.

Stick to the hills and moonshine double bubble. You're only impressing yourself.

LWS said...

How do you get the corndog smell out of your clothes?

Kwyjibo said...

it's a crying shame when a player like Juwan Simpson is forced to sit out a game because of a minor indiscretion. I mean, who hasn't been caught in a car with some weed and a gun?

JeauxBleaux said...

MikeDaTigah,

It's ok to admit that you are French. So are the citizens of Quebec. In a sense, you are cousins.

Mick said...

Lighten up guys, I thought this was very funny.

Kwyjibo said...

Your all stupid if you think Mike Shula has done anything wrong. He don't have no problems with the team. We will win the Suger Bowl and win the championship this year. Roll Tide. We need to buy some new players next year, and the year after that, and then the Tide will be back and we'll win another 12 championships. Awbarn needs to start playing good teams.

geauxtygrrs83 said...

Hey LWS, keep drinking you hillbilly. Maybe the moonshine will eventually make you stop thinking about the decline of the TENN football program.

MikeDaCorndog said...

Les Miles wears funny hats. I like Coach Orgeron's plan. I think he is smart too

Anonymous said...

What does "FLIM FLAM BIM BAM" mean?

Anonymous said...

Fucking hilarious. Now I can go to sleep with good thoughts.

LWS said...

geauxtygrrs83


Maybe we won't blow a 3 TD lead and then lose in OT like somebody's team (corndogs) did last year. Here is some extra reading for you:
http://loserwithsocks.blogspot.com/2006/09/oh-poor-les-miles-poor-corndog-nation.html

Anonymous said...

Speaking of tradition, the one I most enjoy is reading the Tennesse police reports and finding your beloved Vols in there. My favorite is the guy driving on the sidewalk, or how about the one that pulled a fake gun on a cop. Great Stuff. Geaux Tigers and BLEAUX ME!

Anonymous said...

At 7:03 PM, Rupp is Cool said...
You f@#Ks think you invented football and tradition, do you? Well we got Randy Sanders, blow it out your a$$


Well yes we did and good luck with Randy. I ate chili tonight so that will be all I'll be blowing out my a$$!! Thanks for thinking of me though!

Anonymous said...

Dude.....this is some of the funniest shit I have read in awhile. Spot on all accounts. If Kentucky had ANY football tradition, maybe we'd have some sort of retarded ritual....I guess going to a Kentucky football game is retarded in and of itself haha...but anyway, Go Big Blue! Any of you SEC fans out there need to roll by SEC Illustrated.com and join.....lots of SEC talk and such. Pick 'ems. Yeah, I'm a whore...

Anonymous said...

Either you are not considering Arkansas part of the SEC or have never had to hear 60,000 hillbilly's "call the hogs."

Anonymous said...

Nice. Very good stuff and funny.

BTW 620 had to get the attention of the coke vender for those four girls (sat two rows behind them) because he wouldn't reply to their text message.

Anonymous said...

dear jeaux bleaux,

if you would happen to ever read the story of evangeline you would know you are right on. Long live acadia!!!

Anonymous said...

Who cares?

It's all bunch of crackers, anyway. The SEC = Team Deliverance. Your schools' parking lots are filled with tractors and riding mowers. Half time shows include, "Grab Your Spit Cup," and, "Sex Outside the Family."

Anonymous said...

Two points on Ole Miss.

The tents actually come from Wal Mart, not Kmart.

The best take off on the Hotty Toddy cheer is.."Hotty Toddy, Gosh Almighty, We Used to Be Somebody".

Justin said...

I love how you ignorant backwoods fucks like to harp on a baseless internet claim that an entire fan base carries a distinguishable smell. If that and your misdirected criticism of Southern Louisiana culture are all you have, I think you'll find difficulty ever justifying the validity of an actual football-related point. If I were one to attack someone's culture, I'd hasten to mention the inbreeding society that produced a star named Jim Bob Cooter. But I guess you need something to rant about when your own team had to face a QB controversy between Erik Ainge and Rick Clausen (like ordering from a dinner menu consisting of a shit sandwich and a ballsack burrito).

BIG11Sux said...

Something tells me tearing a tee shirt and yelling wildboyz every time BS throws a TD is not going to become a tradition...a tradition really should be somthing practiced more than once every few games.

How about bama's tradition of hiring thoroughly mediocre coaches the last 15 years?

I hate the whoo.

And I find the annual homoerotic team photo Georgia takes pretty annoying (not that there's anything wrong with that).

circledrill said...

This is the most retarded article I've ever read. It's so dumb it's not even funny.
Anyone else notice Coach Tubberville has enormous ears?

wegot 12 said...

Is there a way to set a website cookie or something to block awbarn fans.. i love having a place to have serious dialog about the future of our great program and to discuss the decisions made by our captain Mike Shula, but these dumbass barn rednecks ruin the experience.

Anonymous said...

FYI ... historically, Louisiana is one of the most liberal states in the Union. Liberal Democrats have been running the state for decades. If you feel the need to publish your opinions, you may want to spend 15 minutes doing a little research. I'm guessing your ignorance is bliss.

PCHOT said...

Very entertaining - I just pretend it is only the women singing "Woo" and it gets me through it.

Anonymous said...

Right on with LSUA&M@BR. Baton Rouge is NOT part of Cajun Country. They are just as HICK as Tennessee. However, in the Acadian Parishes we have our own language and culture (that LSU tries to imitate) and it is NOT French my friend. It is the culture of the CAJUNS. Our ancesors left France for a reason..........THEY DID NOT LIKE FRANCE!

(I do think it is funny you are trying to blast LSU, but the first thing the viewer sees is LSU holding a national championship trophy.)

France sucks said...

Coincidentally enough, last time France won a military battle, Louisiana was part of France. France gave all their fighters away when they sold Louisiana to Jefferson & have been paying the price ever since... ;)

Seymore said...

Dead on!
The $EC (Sure Everyone Cheats) should be disbanned.
Southern Miss would dominate the $EC!
GO EAGLES! To the Top!

Rob L said...

I wish you guys would stop linking this to Volquest, more specifically to the Generals Quarters. We do not think you are funny. We do not think that the name of your website, which parodies the name of a great man is not funny. We had to create a new board because of all of you and your "crew". We know who you are

VolBoy7 said...

I was born and raised in Memphis and am raising my family here. Memphis is a great place to live and work. You don't live here and therefore have little if any basis for your vile remarks. As is true with most of your ill-advised posts, you are poorly informed and generally lazy intellectually. I welcome any retorts, since every time you open your mouth you prove my point.

Anonymous said...

Whoever wrote this article has never been to the Grove before and if you have, I dont know who you were hanging out with. Probably a bunch of freshman that didn't know how the Grove actually works. No one actually bring Hidden Valley Ranch and no one brings "buckets" of chicken. Before you write articles you should actually experience it for yourself. I can think of a LOT of other stupid traditions. (Cowbells, the cock at the South Carolina games, Calling the Hogs etc) Despite what you say, the advantage to being in the Grove is the fact that there is one central location where everyone tailgates and has fun. This is a hell of a lot better than tailgating in some concrete hell like most other SEC schools.

Jogle said...

A lot of jokes were made about those that prefered the GQ. They were too uptight and needed to loosen up. Now the BON is always empty. I guess the ones that ruined the BON found that their crap posts were no longer fun when they didn't have an audience. I'm sure we'll be in the same boat here before too long.

The definite positive of this new board is that most posts are Vols related, or at least sports related. Other people may be a member of Rivals for other reasons, but for me it's all about having the inside word on Vol related and college sports related news! Humor sucks

You guys at LWS Suck. I love Brent, Rob, Larry and Ticks Picks.

You guys suck. Internet humor sucks
GBO!

Geauxnads said...

"What does "FLIM FLAM BIM BAM" mean?"

FLIM FLAM is the criteria used for hiring head coaches at Ole Myth. See their present flim-flam artist...

BIM BAM is the last sound an Ole Myth quarterback hears as a defensive end nails him while he's dropping back to pass.

I hope this helps...

Seymore said...

Flim Flam sounds like snot to me. Typical for Old Myth, snotty!

Southern Miss has beaten all these teams! We beat LSU the last time we played then they ran like scared girls.

TO THE TOP!!!!

Anonymous said...

"The single best tailgating place in the country" -Sports Illustrated

You all should change your school colors to green.

Kwyjibo said...

I am wrong about your Blog. This is so funny. I read it everyday.

I know where all that "repressed white boy" anger is directed. And it's even funnier how misguided you folks could be.

Your entire act is built on a cooperative effort with the usual crew. The far-flung boards visited with "Hai-chu"...the entire issue with the stodgy old farts over the BON, the blog. And I forget nothing, never have.

Frankly, I'm obsessed. 45K visitors can't be wrong

Gdawg said...

That's pretty good, though I'd have had to make it a top 10 list and throw in something about Auburn's repeated and nonstop CHEATING/probations, and using retarded athletes such as Irons & Brooks, plus how they have approx 37 different mascots. And let's not forget LSU's torture of opposing fans in Red Stick, delusional SC fans, Gators wearing Jorts, etc.

But yours was good too, albeit only half complete.

Anonymous said...

I know this post is about old, established traditions, but there are many newer ones being established as well in the SEC. I am thinking of one in particular that perhaps some others posting here might be aware of as well: Arkansas continuing to hang the big 'W' on a hapless Tide. Some of you may chalk this up to dumb luck, but many people think something bigger is in motion here, something on a cosmic or divine level. Nevertheless, THAT University in Alabama just keeps rolling over like the Bear's hat each season as the Tide just well, loses to a Hog. It's a tradition that is growing in depth and popularity, I can tell you!

Anonymous said...

As a native of the real French Louisiana, I can tell you that Baton Rouge is about as French as Dallas. It's a cultural black hole, a redneck town looking for some identity other than the land of the tiggers and refineries. The only person on BR that can speak French is Vernon Roger and he offed himself.

And the only people that say "Laissez les bon temps rouler" are non natives and rednecks people trying to sound like they're Cajun. So, obviously, it's popular in BR.

PAC10SUCKS said...

I love SEC traditions, especially the tradition of Tennessee players getting arrested. My favorite is the guy driving on the sidewalk or better yet how about the guy who pulled a fake gun on a cop. BLEAUX ME! GEAUX TIGERS!

Anonymous said...

I completely understand the reasoning behind your Ole Miss comments. Spam-sucking-trailer-park people like you would never fit in at Ole Miss.

BF said...

If the worst tradition is Ole Miss in general, does that mean the greatest SEC tradition is the cheer of:

Go to Hell, Ole Miss. GO TO HELL!!!

Just Asking...

Anonymous said...

No mention of Vanderbilt fraternity dicks and sorostitutes showing up dressed to the nines in the late 2nd quarter? Or did you not know that Vandy football was in the SEC?

LWS said...

"I completely understand the reasoning behind your Ole Miss comments. Spam-sucking-trailer-park people like you would never fit in at Ole Miss."

You're logic is flawed, You Rebels really seem to think Coach O fits in fine.

Anonymous said...

As a transplant from TN to Georgia, I have to say, "Go dawgs, sic 'em, woof, woof, woof" is about as aggravating as anything else.

And for what it's worth, I don't really like Rocky Top, especially with the Woo. The REAL fight song is much better since it's not about drunk hillbillies. Just funloving kids knocking the crap out of each other.

Anonymous said...

Ole Miss is the sorriest excuse for a football program I have ever seen...pitiful....just pitiful....SOUTHERN MISS is by far the best program in that state.......

Anonymous said...

"Ole Miss is the result of a retarded bomb going off in a piece of crap town populated with former high school beauty queens and Colonel Sanders."

That quote made me laugh IRL.

Cmon guys this is satire, and it's well done.

BTW, the Vol fan known as "junior" was my middle school science teacher. He can put down the twinkies...that's for sure.

Seymore said...

You overrated $EC teams are scared of USM and THE ROCK!

TO THE TOP!!!!

atlzamgator said...

Well, here is my list:

The ridiculous playing of "Eye of the tiger" by Survivor before Aubrin games;

The saying "how bout dem dogs" by UGA dorks. Larry Munson saying "we" all the goddamn time.

By far the worst so called tradition: Kentucky Football. Isn't that an oxymoron?

Vandy: That HS stadium they call a home field.

'Cocks- The chick in a dress that is the mascot.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I never realized tennessee fans were so funny. I mean I knew they has to have something going for them after my last trip to knoxville. Judging by the fans, we were gonna play dolls against each other rather than football. Then I saw all their wives and realized why they have so much time for football.

Anonymous said...

I still can't post a picture.

MSU1013

Anonymous said...

Why o' why can't I post a picture?

MSU1013

MUDSUCKEREAUX!! said...

The Mudsucker sez,
"GEAUX FUKEAUX YOURSELFEAUXS"
Hot Boudin'
Cold Cous-cous,
Come on "TIGAHS",
Push, push, push!

Hey I see my old buddy Seymore thinks USM can beat UM and MSU! I think he is right! Try that in Death Valley and you got another thing coming! BAWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

It IS called death Valley for a reason and the fans respond accordingly. We will kill 'yo ass outside as well as in!!!!!!!

Geaux Tigers and give the opponets the "GEAUX GEAUX ROUGE"! If you do not know what it means, go "ax your mama and dem"!

Anonymous said...

MikedaTigah- know what doesn't end with -eaux? Go.

Anonymous said...

Funny...

As I sit here in the metropolis of BR thinking about my proud Cajun/Creole/MSRedneck/TexanHick heritage, I feel sorry for the twit that keeps pluggin Southern Miss "to the top" (of IAA wannabees)

SEC Fan said...

That is some funny shit and I agree with every word!

Vinny said...

lol. funny stuff.

http://the-florida-gators.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

You forgot the Florida Fag arm wave...or as they call it, the Gator Chomp. FSU had the War Chant wavem then FU went and made their own...just slightly different.

Retarded in it's purest form.

Anonymous said...

I'm not an SEC fan by any stretch, but if I may...

The Grove sucks, period, unless you've been drinking since mid-afternoon the previous day, have no compunction whatsoever about harassing anyone within shouting distance, happen to have a shitload of drugs on hand and skip the lousy game. During the Rebel Walk, I wanted so badly to boot all over Eli just to break the quasi-religious spell hanging over the crowd.

Anonymous said...

I'm going to have to incllude Southern Miss simply because MSU and UM have embarrassed the SEC for so many years, so Southern Miss is the state of Mississippi SEC rep from now on.

Have you heard the Eagles yell, "Southern Miss to the top!" after every first down? That's retarded.

Anonymous said...

Maybe thats why Auburn, Alabama smells like sh%%. The so-called students there use all the TP to decorate thier town. Interesting.

Anonymous said...

As a Georgia alum, I have to nominate the "What's that coming down the track"? chant I'm forced to hear no less than 5,000 times before every home game.

Anonymous said...

True, Ole Miss sucks this year and is historically near the bottem of the SEC. But you don't know $hit if you think the Grove sucks. This weekend I'm going to a double-tent with artificial turf on the ground and two flat screen TVs with Satellite TIVO. We can watch every single game played and drink all day long. We've got some of the finest girls in the world, and more importantly, they try extra hard to look their best and they're great and freaky in the sack. I hated Ole Miss before I went to school there. Now, I wouldn't have gone anywhere else. All the hype can't be wrong. #1 Most Retarded SEC Tradition = Arkansas and the plastic Hog heads. Come on! How redneck can you get.

Anonymous said...

When I think of Ole Miss two words come to mind: Clennon King.

This is why I will never root for a team from Mississippi, period. You guys are disgusting.

Anonymous said...

For real - no Gator arms?

Anonymous said...

Baton Rouge is filled with rednecks, oh wait no one there even has a southern accent. Its by far has the most yankees of any sec school. Hald the lsu losers sound like they are from Brooklyn. They should be kicked out of the sec. We dont want a yankee school in our conference. GO BIG ORANGE

Anonymous said...

Bama fans can't even write the English language.

Anonymous said...

There's something special about Ole Miss...I didn't see any other SEC school listed on Sports Illustrated's top 20 Ultimate Sports Experience!!! Tailgating in the Grove is #8....in the same class as watching the Masters, the Summer Olympics, just to name a few.

Anonymous said...

Auburn fans are God's gift to the world, and Alabama fans can't read.
Its in the bible.

Anonymous said...

Um, maybe you forgot that the bulldog mascot of Georgia is named for the abbreviation of the University... "UGA" that's pretty retarded if you ask me. Low blow with Bear though, you really had to scrape the bottom of the barrel for that one. I go to UTK and yeah, the 'woo' is annoying.

Anonymous said...

If the Tide boxes with rolls of toilet paper isn't the dumbest damm thing to ever take place in the history of football, I don't know what is.

Anonymous said...

You Tennessee f*cks are the only fans ion the country that chant during the national anthem at away games. THAT is the worst, most unforgivable tradition in the SEC.

beattie said...

We made the SEC you fuck

Anonymous said...

people who talk trash about Louisiana history are absolute idiots (the Louisiana Purchase allowed half of you idiots a place to call home) granted it is not the best state in the US, but I would rather say that I am from there than all of the one's mentioned. don't hate the tigers because we "Compete" every year. and if you want to talk about going "to the top", please compare your strength of schedule to everyone in the SEC. the SEC has, and will remain one of the best conferences in the NCAA. Oh by the way, Conf. USA is not included in that list

GEAUX TIGERS!!!

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah! We forgot! You can't have a spread similar to The Grove's, because Fulmer's fat ass would inhale it all!

Anonymous said...

It doesn't even upset me that you are putting Ole Miss down as much as you are. If you seriously have enough spare time to sit around and knock SEC traditions, you are one sad person. Get a life, and get out there to experience some real fun. I love the rebels, the grove, and every other tradition that Ole Miss has, and I hope that every other person in this country feels the same way about their favorite college or university. It's called pride. You're a fan whether or not you have the best team in the nation. And personally, I feel that the grove is a beautiful place and it has been stated that Ole Miss has the prettiest landscaping in the United States. Don't be jealous because your football program doesn't have true fans and real traditions, and please don't be hurt that you didn't graduate from Ole Miss and be crowned as Miss America, as several of our beautiful women have been!! I'm a rebel, and I would choose to be nothing else. Don't you wish you were? Don't answer that until you've been to the grove yourself and hung out with true fans.

Anonymous said...

I have nothing to say except well done, sir. Well done.

Anonymous said...

I predict that The Bulldogs are going to hike their leg and leave a stain in Neyland Stadium!!!!! BITCH!

LWS said...

they are playing in athens dumb ass

Anonymous said...

Sick Em Smokey only lasted a year...go back to Neyland and you won't hear it again!

Or maybe you should get your facts straight since they haven't done it in 2 years...when was the last time you went to a game?

The reason Ole Miss can only win a party is because you have to be stupid to get in!

Anonymous said...

Cheers to the anonymous transplant from TN to Georgia...UGA fans simply sound ignorant when they try and bark like a dog...and yes, the mascot, UGA? come on...lets be creatitive now! I can't stand the Bulldogs and Tennessee is going to show them who the boss is, once again this weekend! GO VOLS!!!!

Patrix-desu said...

Wow, I thought vols fans loved the rolling of Toomer's Corner because it gives the ones who actually come to see their team lose a chance to finally discover toilet paper.

Bill said...

I think that is right on. Good work. And to all the Ole Miss, LSUeaux and UT "anonymous" fans, I don't blame you blame for commenting under anonymous. I wouldn't admit I was a fan of those schools either.

Go Hogs.