Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Vols Travelling to Memphis. Advice Received via an Email
Thanks again for the TIP Jogle and VolBoy7 from Volquest (1) Do not ever travel south of Park or north of Summer. (2) Do not attempt to see what's across the tracks from the Liberty Bowl. (3) Do not tell anyone that they have nice rims. (4) Do not expect the Memphis police to be helpful in any way, even if you are being mugged in front of them. (5) Feel free to drink and drive, the only way you will get pulled over is if you are blaring porn on the multiple TV's in the headrests of your Escalade. (6) North Parkway and South Parkway runs east to west. East Parkway runs north to south. Stay off Airways, Lamar and Martin Luther King. (7) If staying in or near Germantown, be prepared to be harassed by the local police at least twice. (8) Yes, Cordova is the cheesiest five mile stretch in the Western world. If you like everything franchised, you will be in heaven. (9) Do not shop at Hickory Ridge Mall. Ever. If shopping at Oak Court, take your gun. (10) Actually, take your gun everywhere, including church, the bar, and the game. (11) Everything you have heard about Memphis is true. Do not trust the local polticians and city officials, Downtown in not safe after dark. Finally, just go to Tunica.